ERIN SIMMONS studio

As I mentioned in my last post, I’m going to be breaking down the most common reasons wardrobes stop working. This is one of the biggest ones.

You’re dressing for a life you don’t have.

This shows up in a few different ways. Maybe your life has changed suddenly and your wardrobe hasn’t caught up. Maybe you’re holding onto a version of yourself that no longer exists. Or maybe you’re buying for a life you imagine yourself living.

Either way, your clothes and your reality are not lining up, and you feel it every time you get dressed.

What This Looks Like

You have clothes for occasions you rarely attend. You have pieces you do not really have anywhere to wear. You have outfits that made sense at one point, but do not anymore.

Meanwhile, the clothes you actually need are limited.

So your closet looks full, but getting dressed feels overwhelming.

Look at Your Life Honestly

Take a step back and look at your actual week. Not the ideal version, the real one.

• How many hours are you working?
• What are you actually wearing during those hours?
• How often are you at home?
• What do you reach for when you are just living your life?

If you spend most of your time at home, most of your clothes should support that. If you go into an office once a month, you do not need a closet full of office outfits.

Your closet should reflect how you actually spend your time.

If 80% of your week is spent at home, roughly 80% of your clothes should work for that version of your life. Right now, for most people, those numbers do not match.

When Life Changes

Sometimes this is not about fantasy. It is about transition. Your life shifts, and your wardrobe does not keep up.

You might:

• Have a child
• Change careers
• Move cities
• Go through a major identity shift

It takes time to figure out what works in a new phase of life. During that time, focus on what is reliable.

Clothes that:

• Fit well
• Feel comfortable
• Allow you to move through your day without thinking too much about them

You do not need to figure everything out at once.

Letting Go of a Previous Version of Yourself

Sometimes the issue is not your current life. It is your attachment to a past one.

You might be holding onto:

• A body you no longer have
• A lifestyle that no longer exists
• A version of yourself you do not fully relate to anymore

Those pieces sit in your closet, but they also sit in your mind. They make getting dressed feel heavier than it needs to be.

You do not need to rush letting go. But you do need to be honest about what no longer fits your life.

The Decision

You have two options:

• Dress for the life you actually have
• Build the life you are dressing for

Both are valid.

But trying to do both at the same time is what creates the disconnect.